Thursday, May 18, 2017

# Dear Aama # Dear Best Friend

Have you ever felt the importance of life when you already know that you are leaving all your belongings behind and take the challenge of never ever coming back live?

You waited for the absolute truth of the Universe from the bed at the age of 82 years and held that courage and patience since long you know what will happen to you. You had the flashbacks, your grandparents, your parents, your birth home, your karma home, your better half. You had flashbacks of the things you have created from your own hands, beautiful mind. You had flashbacks of the things you have created from your womb to keep alive your successors for years and eras to come after you leave everything behind. The time you spent with struggles and deeds have the greatest ever inventions from you for all our blessings and gifts. It is really negligible when expressed in words. To be honest, I have to express, otherwise who else does so?

Yes, I have felt what was in your mind from the bed you spent since quite long before you took rest. Today, yesterday and each following day your reminiscence reverberates into my mind. I have embraced you to feel at the deepest core of your heart that day. I cried and you listened and nobody noticed what really happens between you and me. I have asked you every detail of the events and happenings of your life year wise, incident wise since you know to perceive your surroundings. Although physically you are not here with us, I remember in the same wooded VARANDA of our home, we used to talk long-long time during night. You would spun the holy thread for every morning and evening light offerings to god and holy ancestors with your beautiful hands and I would irritate you asking again and again resting on your lap. That makes me emotional time and again.
That day! I do not ever forget till the last breath is within me and till the last drop of blood I have in my body; I lost the two most important persons of my life with whom I feel that I am secured, I am attached and never ever are separable from this heart. I have never felt like smiling since then and there is nothing in the earth that could replace and calm this heavy heart.

I know how it feels, because I have myself felt death from so close time and again in my life. Death really echoes my mind frequently. I tried hard to inspire someone someday; I tried hard to make happy someone someday; I tried hard to respect and value someone someday; I tried hard to retain someone someday and someday I lost everything. The depth of this possessive heart knows how it means to lose the most inspiring persona you ever felt while holding the hands and embracing the wonderful souls.

It's deep, deep respect and so true love for you two missing person of my life the same day with no sharable thoughts to anyone and calligraphic words whatsoever. I owe and badly miss you two throughout this life and can't ever be replaced with any, anything.


# Dear Aama # Dear Best Friend!!!

Monday, May 15, 2017

I SWEAR, GOD - I WILL KILL YOU
BRUTALLY WITH THE SAME STONE
YOU HIT ME AND MY FATE

You God,
You are bastard

You made fun of me
You made fun of my honesty
You made fun of my dedication
You made fun of my life
You made fun of my career
You made fun of my depression

You God,
You are cheater

You played with me
You played with my sentiments
You played with my deeds
You played with my trust
You played with my hard work
You played with my blood, tears and sweat
You bastard

Why did you do this to me?
Why do you act like an innocent?
WHY?
You snatched my happy life
You snatched my growing career
You snatched my entire belongings
Why didn't you dare to kill me that day?
WHY BASTARD GOD, WHY?

Someday,
You earned me fame
You earned me name
You earned me relations
You earned me friends
You earned me someone calling best friend

And now,
You cheat, you bitch God!
You took everything from me.
You didn't you just leave anything?

You bastard,
You wanted someone tell me no one
You lied with my fate
You cheated my good intentions

You acted someone telling best friends
And you stab knife on my back so hard
You acted some opportunity to me
And you hit me with the stone on my face

Never ever God,
Never ever, you are forgiven
I'll hang you if I find you
I'll hit you with the stone
So hard, you'll never realize
Cheating with me again,
Playing with me again,
Acting with me again,

I swear, I'll snatch from you everything
I've cried more than one and half years
I curse you, bitter than the bitch
I curse you, bitter than the witch

And yet again, I am not satisfied
You God, You Bastard,
You appeared in different form
To destroy me and my entire things
I will not leave you until my last breath
I will kill you bastard!!!