TOO LONG, TOO OLD ...

Living a careless mornings

Cruel days

And awful nights

Too hard to cope

With this heavy heart

This swinging brain

Black soul hunts

Down these dreadful seasons

With beautiful silk dresses

Muting voices

Pierced memories

Hammered head

Has untold stories

For years

Too long, too old...

Hidden & truthful secret...

Composed: JeevDsk

REST FOR FREE

I take a long sigh

Deep breath

In fact, very-very deep

I have felt the upturns and downturns

Of the life,

That never rested my mind

Now,

I am feeling necessity

To live beyond this Earth

No matter what,

I feel no one is caring for

I want to rest in peace

For a long-long time

I woke up all nights

Never felt sleeping free

Now,

I think I should be freed

From the bond of belongingness

From the world of selfish

I want to Rest in Peace

Desperately, Eternally & Entirely

Please!

"GUM KA ANSOO" - Lyrics

udsf cfFz' lk /xf x'F d]F

ghfg] sf}g ;'g]uf, o] ud xdf/]

;kg] d] vf] /xf x'F d]F

ghfg] sf}g ag]+uf, o] ;kg] xdf/]

8'F8 /xf x'F hdfg] ;]

p; r]x]/]sf] a]tfa ;]

ghfg] sf}g x] jf] r]x]/f

hf] cKgf ;f hf] yf

hfuf /]x]tf x'F cljle

7lG8 nlDa /ftf]F d]

ghfg] sf}g hfu] /]x]t] x]

lh:sf bb{sf] ;demt] x'j]

udsf cfFz' lk /xf x'F d]F

ghfg] sf}g ;'g]uf, o] ud xdf/] ===

hf] cfbt ;f ;x'jf Lyrics

hf] cfbt ;f x'jf                 Ps df};d ;f yf

lhGbuL gzf ag uof             jf] tf] rnf uof

;f]of ;f]of b'lgofF d]              v'Zj' afxf/ ags/ gfhfg] ls;sf

d] cs]nf hfuf /xf               Kof/sf a'vf/ ag uof cfksf

h'g"g ;jf/ yf                   d] cs]nf cfksf]

Ps cfks] lnP                   hfg] sxfF sxfF 9'+8 rnf

hf] yf jf] ag uof                du/ gf ;f]rf sle

jf] cfbt ;f xdf/f                d]+tf] sa;] n'6f x'jf ;f yf

8/tf yf o'xL                     s];] e"n hfpF jf] jfb]

sxLF vf] gf hfpm                 hf] xdg] vfP y]

vf]b'F d]/L b'lgofF                   s];] e"n hfpF jf] r]x]/f

du/ e"ngf hfpm cfksf]          hf] d':s'/ft] tf] y], du/===

hf] cfbt ;f x'jf, lhGbuL gzf ag uof

;f]of ;f]of b'lgofF d], d] cs]nf hfuf /xf

Objections!

From the relationships I have had

(From relatives to bonding & including those all whom I valued from the depth of heart)

From the vision & missions I have had

(From what I perceive, learn, create & become)

From the goals & destinations I see clear because of using own logic & ideas

(In contrary, they were seen blur & useless)

From this filthy life – those everyone who humiliate & took advantage of

Shortly,

Became f**king tired, pissed, messed

Accused & time & again humiliated

Against only for the sake of their good at long term

From the public's point of view

Demotivated from every aspects

Thus planning to quit

May you be happy, all, because I shall never be in between?

God Bless You,

I may Q-U-I-T!

RELATIONSHIP DIES

WITNESS DOES NOT

Feelings were killed

Emotions were rapped

Trust were lost

And psychology were jumbled

So the relationship dies

Yet witness does not

My ears were your witness

Your eyes were my witness

My confidence was your energy

And your happiness was my stamina

All of a sudden, but

Relationship dies

Yet witness does not...

No More Young, No More Energetic

Do you remember those days?

Those ‘wow wow’ words

Those movies

Those long walk to home

Do you remember that inspiration?

That team work

Flirting & chatting

And realizing the realities at the end

Do you remember when one counts as best one?

The backup one had for each other

That “slxNo} g%'l§\g] ;fyL” word

Those sharing and again realizing the realities at the end

I became a culprit all of a sudden

Because I should let it go

Should always think that I was no one

Despite of anything and any deeds I do

And always I realize

For whom was those words were

When I was just ignored becoming a risk factor

While I was no more young & I was no more energetic

There was a complete mess & replacement

There was cheating for desire fulfillment

There was an option

And there was a game plan intentional or unintentional

Can’t write too long; it’s become a history!

No more young – no more energetic ...... Uff.

HAPPY – SAD

Do you ever feel,

What a weeping soul says?

Do you ever feel,

When hundreds of cups of teas were supported by thousands of cigarettes

Do you ever think of other?

When you felt awesome, wonderful & relaxed?

When you were busy on caring other's spouse & child?

Do you remember August 7^th 2015?

Do you remember October 4^th 2015?

Do you remember October 14^th 2015?

Do you remember November 11^th 2015?

Do you remember December 17^th 2015?

Do you remember December 25^th 2015?

Do you remember January 8^th 2016?

Do you remember January 24^th 2016?

DO you remember January 28^th 2016?

DO you remember February 10^th 2016?

Do you remember February 23^rd 2016?

Do you remember February 28^th 2016?

DO you remember March 13^th 2016?

Do you remember March 29^th 2016?

Do you remember April 3^rd 2016?

Do you remember April 12^th 2016?

Do you remember April 14^th 2016?

Do you remember April 16^th 2016?

Do you remember April 17^th 2016?

Do you remember April 30^th 2016?

Do you remember April 31^st 2016?

Do you remember May 30^th 2016?

Do you remember June 8^th 2016?

Do you remember June 22^nd 2016?

Do you remember June 28^th 2016?

Do you remember June 29^th 2016?

Do you remember July 1^st 2016?

Do you remember July 7^th 2016?

Do you remember July 8^th 2016?

Do you remember July 15^th 2016?

Your headache,

Your busy schedule,

Your tiredness,

Your ignorance,

Your every hot night,

And how come one went in between?

And how come one came to be one-sided?

And how come one irritated?

And how come one was disgusting?

Do you remember July 20^th 2016?

Do you remember July 23^rd 2016?

Do you remember July 28^th 2016?

Do you remember August 1^st 2016?

Do you remember August 2^nd 2016?

Do you remember August 7^th 2016?

Do you remember August 14^th 2016?

Do you remember September 17^th 2016?

Do you remember September 18^th 2016?

Do you remember September 28^th 2016?

Do you remember October 3^rd 2016?

Do you remember October 5^th 2016?

Do you remember October 18^th 2016?

Do you remember November 24^th 2016?

Do you remember November 25^th 2016?

Do you remember December 14^th 2016?

And finally, that soul which weeps alone

Is a culprit

Is a player

Is over-smart

Is a diplomat

Is an addicted

Phew…….. Thank you!

FALSIFICATION

Busy schedules, scratches and false accusations

All over the mind, heart and trust buzzing

But, never gonna give up

Because, there in fact was no game

Grunting pains from different sources

But happy, to take over someone's conspiracy

And tell just sorry, because

You need patience and courage to face falsification

There was clean divine trust

Swept away, snatched away

Along by an unintentional gamer

Who plays until the same will fall under its own typhoon

Okay and so comfortable, never felt before

Because day comes when false reports are countered

ha d ...

ha d cfo{#f^sf] %]j}df a;]/

ToxL lrtfsf] cfuf] tfK%"

nfU%, To;n] dnfO{ af]nfO{ /x]sf] %

ha ToxL &fpm+df a;]/

a]n"sLsf] cf/tL w"g ;"G%"

nfU%, d ToxL w"gx?df u"d x"+b}%"

ha d cfo{#f^sf] nf;x?nfO{ x]{%"

lk+*f dfly lk+*f vflkG% d]/f] dl:tisdf

clg nfU%, d]/f] an]sf] nfzsf] cfuf] s;}n] tfk]sf] x"G%

cfh ef]ln nfU%, d u"d x"+b}%"

nfU%, d lk+*fsf] sfqf]dfq} cf*\b} %"

nfU%, d ToxL w"gx?df dfq} x/fO{ /x]sf] x"G%"

ha d=======================

LONE AND ALIVE

For a peace in this heart

I try to explore hundreds of miles

For the eternal happiness

I try to work till death with fullest dedication

Millions of bubbles of thoughts

That pours in this mind

Hundreds of thousands of feelings

I did never shared

Billions of words to utter to thy

I always swallowed to myself

And yet with broken pieces of heart

I smile endlessly

Because I am alone

And I am just alive

There's no one who even know

And there's no one who cared for

Therefore, million times I dumped

My thoughts and feelings and emotions and words

Into the unknown basket

That vanished with time

Yet I advocated thy belongings

To held her head high always, no matter what

With pride, respect, value and acknowledgements

Sincerely and with dedications

Towards who, today thy is

In front of whatever comes ahead

Because I was and am alone

Yet I am just alive

A futile smile and with a fragile heart

But with supernatural power of thoughts

I presumed thy as my best one

In short time, short moment we endured

Time passed by, it passes by and this life perishes shortly

Remembrances poured and poured and poured

Like the blood circulation

Continuous, and tireless and restlessly

Because I was and am alone: And yet I am just alive !!!

d/]/ af+Rg" clg, af+r]/ dg"{sf] lk+*f

klg ef]u]+ d}n]]+ ;fyL

k|To]s lbg, d/]/ af+Rg" clg

af+r]/ dg"{sf] lk+*f, klg ef]u]+ d}n]]+ ;fyL

k|To]s lbg, cfvfleqsf] cf+z'

aufp+b} ;"sfp+b} ;f+Rg"sf] lk+*f, klg ef]u]+ d}n]]+ ;fyL

k|To]s lbg,

d"^" lgrf]l/g" clg

dl:tis layf]lng"sf] lk+*f

klg ;x]+ d}n]]+ ;fyL

k|To]s lbg clg /ft,

clgwf] a;]/, pm ghfpGh]n

cfkm' h:tf] kl/l:yltdf ePklg

;fy / ;xof]u lbG%" elg ;f]r]/ klg

lt/:sf/ ;lxt PlSng" kg]{sf] lk+*f

klg ;x]+ d}n]]+ ;fyL

k|To]s /ftx?,

ltd|f %nx? ;x]/

cfkm}af^ ulNt x"g" To;kl% ;hfo kfpg"sf] lk+*f

klg ef]u]+ d}n]]+ ;fyL

%f]^f] ;dodf,

ltd|f kfOnf kfOnfdf cj;/sf] dfnf u"Yb} ubf{

ltdL / pm aLrdf k"Ug"sf] lk+*f

klg vk]++ d}n]]+ ;fyL

To;}sf/)f t,

cfkm" x"g", cfkm" sdhf]/ x"g" clg cfkm" g/xg"sf] lk+*f

leq leq} klg

cndlnP+ d ;fyL

w]/} s"/f u"dfO{;Sbf klg

cem} PSNofO lbg"kg]{

clg ldqtf em\ofpm nfu]/ cfkm" af]em x"g"sf] lk+*f

klg vk]++ d}n]]+ ;fyL

clg cGTodf,

cs}{;+u uPb]lv gkmls{g"

clg cfkm" k"/fgf ofbx? ;Dem]/ cfp+% elg klv{g"sf] lk+*f

klg ;x]+ d}n]]+ ;fyL  ...

b"O{ lbgsf] lhGbuL

xf+:g} t % lg, b"O{ lbgsf] lhGbuL

af+Rg} t % lg, b"O{ lbgsf] lhGbuL ..

/f]P/} eP klg xf+;L lbG%" d

of] s]jn b"O{ lbgsf] lhGbuL ..

cfTdfdf k|f)f /x] ;Dd

w*\sg leq Zjfz rn] ;Dd

s]jn ca b"O{ lbgsf] lhGbuL ..

xf+:g} t % lg, b"O{ lbgsf] lhGbuL

af+Rg} t % lg, b"O{ lbgsf] lhGbuL ..

/f]P/} klg xf+;L lbG%" d

ha ;Dd rN% of] lhGbuL ...

"PINCH"

It was your heart - That was pinched

It was my heart - That was pinched

That pinch, you felt - Was romantic to you

Because you were pinched - In the district beyond Himalayas

This pinch, I felt - Was heart-breaking

Because I was pinched – I being no-one;

Pinch - Yes, it was pinched by the same person

For whom you valued for - But I only tried to value you

And the third person - Became second person;

And you said I was in between - When did I happen to go, I never knew?

So I was restless panicking with frustration – I could retain no-one

Because I was fighting with life – You were there at romantic spots

I struggled hard to avoid that pinch - But knew never, you did or not?

That pinch was always terrifying at the end – risky for both

Though, romantic to you initially – But will not be so long lasting

But I tried my hard with all best efforts – to avoid for you as well

But within such series of pinches – I was targeted by you both

Today you are happy; I am lost

Through you, he won, you also won - I lost

I lost the most valuable creature to me within the blink of eyes

Very much unknowingly - really never thought of that part

It was for friendship though 

Each day fills this eyes-heart with tears, guilt & fire of agony

Each day I am pinched - EACH DAY, EVEN NOW

It was your heart - That was pinched

It was my heart - That was pinched

Pinch - it was pinched by the same person

For whom you valued for - But I only tried to value you!!!

d"em] t"d gh/ ;]===

d"em] t"d gh/ ;] lu/f tf] /x] xf]

d"em] t"d slele e"nf gf ;sf]u],

ghfg] d"em] So"+ ols+ xf] rnf x]

d]/] Kof/sf] t"d ld^f gf ;sf]u]

d"em] t"d gh/ ;]===

d]/L ofb xf]uL, lhw/ hfcf]u] t"d

sle gudf ags], sle ags] cfz'+

t*ktf d"em] x/t/km kfcf]u] t"d

zdf hf] hnfO{ x] d]/L jkmfg]

a"emfgf le rfxf], aemfgf ;sf]u]

d"em] t"d gh/ ;]===

sle gfd aftf]d] cfof hf] d]/f

tf] le r}g, xf]s] lbn yfd nf]u]

lgufxf] d] %fPuf uds] c+w]/f

ls;Lg] hf] k"%f zjfj cfz"+sf

atf le rfxf], atfgf ;sf]u]

d"em] t"d gh/ ;] lu/f tf] /x] xf]

d"em] t"d slele e"nf gf ;sf]u]

d"em] t"d gh/ ;]===

LIES MADE ME MAKE MISTAKES

She followed his success;

And him to taste the new choice;

And his power – and Futile I became

Fragile I became;

She swallowed all the joys and sorrows

We had together in friendship

And loved his care – in the Himalayas

She talked and shared all what she had

Days and nights, and owed his importance

Despite of sorrows and toils

I chewed all grief on behalf of her – In the valley

So that she would not fall,

So that she would not fail,

So that she would not cry in misery

But she was a bowl of mystery;

Lies, lies and lies, till I made the mistake

And she got the chance to formally

Tell me I am no one – because

I was exchanged in the Himalayas

With him – by the one whom I valued the most

For whom I tried my level best

I became no one for her,

Did not adjust in her friend’s circle

Because I could not take her to the Himalayas

Because I could not take her to new restaurants each lunch hours

Because I could not accompany her all the night to chat

Because I was a failure

Because I was weak; and depressed

Because I was shadowed

Because my truth were bitter

Because I became no one to her.. ..

Yet I wanted her to be safe

I wanted to do what she needs

I wanted to support and care her

I wanted to give warmth of friendship

I wanted to love her until she is here

I wanted to retain her until she marries

I lost because lies made me make mistakes

Though I was already exchanged in the

Himalayas, Lakes, National Parks, Temples & Monasteries

I was exchanged in the Rivers, Hotels & Restaurants

I was exchanged for success, money & power..

Because I was not there!!! And made a mistake!!!

STOLEN LIFE: From the Dearest – For the Replaced!

I want to live, but I'm dying

I want to smile, but I'm crying

There isn't any moment

I'm not pinched into the heart

I need the cardiologist

And there isn't any moment

I'm not tortured into the brain, by those faces

I need the psychologist

Watery eyes and this empty heart

Wants what, that has been tore apart

From the dearest

For the one whom I was replaced

I want to live, but I'm dying

I want to smile, but I'm crying

Just a few days, few months & few years now

And lots of trouble within

Never got chance to enjoy life beautifully

And when I did get, my happiness were stolen

From the dearest

For the one whom I was replaced

chglj z]x]/ s], chdlj /f;t]

1= chglj z]x]/ s], chdlj /f;t]    3= sn s"% P;] x"jf d] axt ys uof

  d]/] tgxfO{ k/ d":s"/ft] /x]         O;lnP ;"gs] le, cg;"lg s/ uof

  d] ax"t b]/ ts o'xL rnf /xf==     lstgL ofbf] s] e^\s] x'j] sf/jf

  t'd axt b]/ ts ofb cft] /x]===    lbns] hVdf] s] */, v^v^ft] /x]===

2= h]x]/ ldntf /xf, h]x]/ lktf /xf    4= zSt xfnt s] t'kmfgd]

  /f]h d/t] /x], /f]h lhtf /xf         uL/ uof yf xdf/f h'g'g P jkmf

  lhGbuL le xd], cfhdftL /xL         hVd ha le sfO{ h]xfg lbn k/ nuf

  cf}/ xd le p;], cfhdftf /xf===      lhGbuL ls t/km, Ps b/]rf v"nf

5= xd le vf]of ls;L ;fhs] tf/ x]

  rf]^ vft] /x] u"gu"gft] /x]

  chglj z]x]/ s], chdlj /f;t]

  d]/] tgxfO{ k/ d":s"/ft] /x] ..

"df];d pxL, dg km/s"

xf], oxL df};d lyof], Tof] a]nf

lemlnldnL aQL clg, b]p;] e}n]sf w"gx?

t/ dgdf w]/} s"/fx? /dfO{nf lbgx?sf],

%f]*]/ hf+b} lyP+ p;nfO{, ;a}nfO{ === PSn}, sxf+ sxf+ kQ} lyPg

ux el/ cfz'+ lyof], dgdf */ dfq lyof]

xf], oxL df};d lyof], Tof] a]nf ...

hfg] a]nfdf p;n] lbPsf], Tof] slZd/L vf:^f]

;Dem]+ dfofsf] lrgf] xf]nf, === slxNo} g;fl^\g] efjgfn] cf]tk|f]t

t} klg Gofgf] lyof], uf(f :g]xn] el/Psf],

cflTdotf clg ;fldKotfsf] cg"e'tL lbg], ToxL dfq t lyof] lg d;+u ===

v";L g} t lyP+ d klg, xf+:g l;s]sf] lyP+,

/dfpg klg, p;}n] l;sfPsf], === s] yfx s;nfO{, d]/f] cfo" %}g eGg]

PSn} PSn} d[To";+u h"em\bf, htg u/L %ftLdf /fv]sf]

Tof] slZd/L vf:^f], /ut\n] nt\kltPsf] /x]%

xf], oxL df};d lyof], Tof] a]nf ...

g pm d]/f] k|]ldsf lyO{, g t gft]bf/

pm d]/f] k/d\ ldq lyO{, d}n] pg]sf] ldqtf

clg la:tf/} km]/L, u}O{ pm clg

em'^ af]n]/ clg %n]/, d;+u To;sf] nflu, === ldqtf ;f^]/

v";L g} t lyP+ km]/L klg, pm lyO{ sxL+, kv]{sf] lyP+, kms]{/ cfp+% eg]/

t/ uO{, w]/} ^f(f uO{, To;sf] nflu, === d}n] lbg] dfof ;f^]/, lxdfn kf/Ldf ...

cflv/ rZdf d]/} bf]ifL lyof] .

zfGt /ft clg pgsf] ;Demgf ...

zfGt /ft clg pgsf] ;Demgf

cfn} % l;/fgL km]/L ..

zfGt /ftdf clg :tAw dg d]/f]

ofbx? leqsf kfgf k(\bf k(\b} ..

/ftx?n] sf]N^] km]/L;Sof]

t/ klg pgsf] rl/q dGygdf Jo'+em}% dl:t:s d]/f] ..

zfGt /ft clg pgsf] ;Demgf

cfn} % l;/fgL km]/L ..